I Want You To Want Me
by whatthequack
Summary: Amy Juergens, now eight months pregnant, contends with plans for her baby and her hidden feelings for Ricky. Ricky/Amy fanfic.
1. The World Against Us

Amy Juergens walked down the hallway of Grant High School to her chemistry class, fully aware of the stares of other students,

Amy Juergens walked down the hallway of Grant High School to her chemistry class, fully aware of the stares of other students, who were all noticing her large bulge which was, in a little over a month, going to be her child.

She sighed and rubbed her belly affectionately. "I know," she said to him. "I hate the attention too."

She then saw Ben Boykewich, her first—and now _ex_—boyfriend. Quickly, awkwardly, she turned away, pretending to stop at the drinking fountain. Ever since their breakup two months ago, things were stiff between the two of them. Things were stiff between everyone nowadays.

Her ex-best friends Madison and Lauren had also left her alone. Lauren had been caught kissing Ricky Underwood, the father of Amy's child, and her parents who found out about the pregnancy had banned her from seeing Amy. Madison went out with Ben after him and Amy broke up, and hadn't told her.

She gave Ricky a withering stare as he passed her. He simply looked back at her—no, he looked back at her belly. Of course. Would anyone ever look at her face and not her belly for once?

Amy sat sadly and alone on the bench at the bus stop outside of school, waiting for the bus to come pick her up. A tear escaped her eye and landed appropriately on the belly of her shirt.

"Dammit!" she sobbed. "Why did this have to happen?" Her little boy kicked her, as if to remind her that he could hear her. "I'm sorry," she said.

"Talking to your child again, Amy?" Ricky sat down next to her, a hint of a smile on his face.

"What do you want?" Amy snapped. She laid back on the bench, hands resting on her belly. "You've already done…_this_." She gestured to her waist.

Ricky was silent for awhile, staring the passing cars. "Is it…is it a boy or a girl?" he asked carefully—almost gently.

Amy contemplated whether telling him was a good thing. "It's a boy," she said.

Ricky's face lit up. "Really?"

"Yes, really. What, you were _planning_ to get me pregnant or something? You wanted a son at sixteen?"

Ricky snorted. "No. Why can't you just get over the fact that you're pregnant and live with it?"

Amy looked at him like he was crazy. Then she gave him a sort of I-knew-it look. "Of course. You go and have sex with me, get me pregnant, and then expect _me_ to take responsibility for it? What's your problem anyway? You just seduce every girl you meet?"

"Listen, I only do it to girls I like. And I _like_ you. Get that? I wouldn't just do it to every girl I meet." Ricky shook his head. "I'm leaving. Tell me when the kid pops out." He stood up to leave, but Amy was quick to grab his arm and turn him around.

"I don't care if you don't care about me! I need you to care about my _baby_, especially considering he has your crappy genes!" Amy let go, nearly pushing Ricky off the curb. "What am I saying? You wouldn't care. Just go home, already."

"I would, but I don't _have_ a home," Ricky spat. He spun around and walked home, still shaking his head.

_What am I doing?_ Amy thought, sobbing now. _I need Ricky. I need him, and so does my baby._ She sat down and cried into her hands.


	2. Outburst

**A/N: Thanks for all the great feedback! Here is the second chapter, a little bit longer but still a bit short. Sorry for the short-ness, by the way. And remember: REVIEWS ARE GOOD FOR YOU. xx Sally**

"Amy, I found the address for the planned parentalhood clinic." Amy's mother, Anne, sat at the computer scribbling something down on a sheet of paper. When Anne handed it to her, she held it like it was a holy relic.

"You don't have to do this if you don't want to," Anne said, replying to the look on Amy's face. "I'm always here for you, and your dad and your sister are, too."

"What help would they be?" Amy said, her voice cracking. "They've never been through this. They never had to carry a child around when they were just fifteen."

"Oh, Amy," her mother sighed. She enveloped Amy with her arms and brought her close, stroking her brown hair. "It's all going to be okay. Everything will be back to normal soon."

Amy broke away, face buried into her tearstained hands. "No, it's not, Mom!" she cried. "_Look_ at me! I'm fat. _Really_ fat. How will I be able to live with myself after the baby? Everyone's going to look at me and say, 'Oh, that girl had a baby!'"

Anne sat down at the table. Amy had been doing this for months. Of course, mood swings and random moments of crying were part of being pregnant. But Amy had never seemed to get past the news and start taking charge of her life and her baby's.

She gave Amy a stiff one-arm hug, rubbing her daughter's back. "It's okay. Let's just go; it'll be easier once we get there."

Amy gave out a huge sigh. She snagged her jacket from the coat rack and trudged outside against her will.

_I should have said no_, Amy thought when they arrived. _I should have never agreed to come here!_ Everything about the clinic was awkward and rigid. The atmosphere was tense and nervous, and everyone couldn't help but glance at each other, see who was the most pregnant. Amy came a close second to a girl of about seventeen, who seemed to be in her ninth month already.

The doctor who was helping everyone called out names of people. They went into her office for a half hour and came out with a bunch of flyers.

"Amy Juergens?" she called, but just then the door opened and there stood Ricky. Amy was struggling to get up when she saw him.

"_Ricky?_" she cried, falling back down to her seat. "What are you _doing_ here?"

Ricky looked around at the group of teenaged mothers. "I—uh, I just came here for condoms," he said finally. "I…um…yeah. See?" He snatched a box up from the counter and waved them in Amy's face.

"You didn't bother to use these with me, huh?" she said stonily. Anne rushed her past him quickly, before this evolved into something else. Ricky followed her and spun her around as Anne walked into the office, unaware that her daughter was not with her.

"Listen, will you just stop blaming me for everything?" Ricky said quietly and darkly, gripping Amy's arm. "It's your fault too that this happen. You could have stopped me if you want."

Amy loosened her arm out of his grip. "It's the guy's responsibility to wear a condom. What, _after_ getting me pregnant you decide to use condoms? I bet I'm not the first one you've…knocked up." She winced as she said it. She hated to use those vulgar terms. Ricky opened his mouth to protest, but Amy held up her hand to stop him. "Don't even bother. You're nothing to me now." With that, she strode into the office, shutting the door so hard she could hear the cement inside crumble.

Ricky stood there in the lobby, lost and desolated. He cursed under his breath, threw the condoms at the main desk, and stormed out.

**A/N: Thanks for all the great feedback! Here is the second chapter, a little bit longer but still a bit short. Sorry for the short-ness, by the way. And remember: REVIEWS ARE GOOD FOR YOU. xx Sally**


	3. Planning

**A/N: Thanks again for all your reviews! I did my best to make this longer than the others, and tried to keep it in character and interesting, but I'm sorry if this doesn't meet your standards. Warning: No Ricky in here, but I still suggest reading the whole thing if you want a clue as to what happens next! **

Amy sat down in the chair before the doctor. She looked around nervously at the white walls, covered with pictures of family and friends, crayon drawings from a daughter, and many certificates. There was a green bamboo plant in one corner, and a stack of magazines and children's books on a chair. Amy couldn't help but think that one day her son would be reading one of those books.

The doctor was a tall strawberry blonde woman, wearing a white coat, reading glasses perched on her nose, with brown heels. She smiled as she sat down.

"Hello, Amy. My name is Dr. Jenson," the woman said kindly.

"Hi," was all Amy could say, giving a little wave.

"Now, before we get started, I would like to get to know a little about you and your pregnancy." Dr. Jenson propped her clipboard against the desk, pen poised and ready to write. She asked Amy all the typical things—her age, the sex of her baby, how far she was, and what plan she had in mind after she gave birth to her child.

"Well…I kind of want to keep the baby," said Amy, and Anne's eyes flickered to her daughter momentarily. Amy said she wanted to put him up for adoption, not keep him! Amy looked back at her mother, too. "But then I kind of want to put him up for adoption. I just want him to have good life and be safe." Amy's confident face quickly changed to her own self-confusion. "But I don't want to give him the impression that I don't care about him! I just…I just don't know anymore. I don't have anyone to help me raise him. If I do keep him…he'll have a hard life. I've never thought about taking care of babies. I probably won't even know how to feed him."

Dr. Jenson paused in her state of scribbling. She smiled at Amy. "Oh, honey, don't worry about that stuff! You do what you want to do. You are in charge of yourself and your baby. And the motherly instincts will come to you naturally; there's no need to worry about that." She pulled a blue flyer out from a thick stack of papers. "If you are thinking about adoption, here is a good place to go. They interview the families thoroughly and match your baby up with the perfect parents."

Amy didn't look up. She stared at her feet, at the brown carpet. She didn't _know_ what to do anymore. A few minutes ago, she was confident that she was putting the baby up for adoption. Now, she wasn't so sure. If only Ricky could understand…

"Amy?" Dr. Jenson's voice interrupted Amy's train of thoughts. "Are you alright?"

Amy did her best not to cry. "No. No, I'm _not_ alright, and I never _will_ be! I don't know what to _do_ anymore. I just…I just want what's best for the baby." She took a deep breath to hold back her tears. She looked at her mom, then at Dr. Jenson. "Can't one of you tell me what to do?"

"Like I said before, dear, this is _your _choice and your choice only. Nobody can stop you if you want to put it up for adoption or keep the baby." Dr. Jenson's voice was warm and inviting. She had a sad yet serious expression on her face. "Here's what I've come up with. I'll let you and your mother discuss this for some time, then come back in and tell me your decision. I can help you with _anything_." The doctor tipped her face slightly and smiled at Amy. "I'm always here if you need me, Ms. Juergens."

Amy let out her breath again. "Okay," she said. She gestured to her mom to go outside. Once they were back in the lobby, Amy said, "I'm _not_ going back in there, Mom. This is way too fast."

Anne took her daughter by her shoulders and made Amy face her. "Listen to me, Amy," said Anne, and this time her voice was stern. "I am not going to make a decision for you, and neither is that doctor. This isn't going too fast, either. You are going to have a baby in less than _one_ month. It's time you made your decision." She saw the tears forming in Amy's eyes. "But I will support you in whatever decision you make. Even if you want to keep him."

Amy's eyes widened. This was the first time her mom had called her grandchild a "him" and not an "it". She knew that her mother was right. She nodded and said, "Okay. I'm keeping the baby."

Her mother recoiled. "What? Just like that?"

"Yeah," said Amy. "I think I know what to do." It was time to talk to Ricky.

**A/N: Thanks again for all your reviews! I did my best to make this longer than the others, and tried to keep it in character and interesting, but I'm sorry if this doesn't meet your standards. Warning: No Ricky in here, but I still suggest reading the whole thing if you want a clue as to what happens next! **


	4. Confessions

**A/N: This is the last chapter! I will not be updating this story anymore :( I had to end it because school is starting soon and so I will not have as much time! Pleeeease review! **

The doorbell rang at the Juergens' house. Ashley, Amy's fourteen year old sister, went to answer it. It was the bag boy from the grocery store—the one that gave her a lift one hot day while she was ditching school.

"Hi," Henry, the bag boy, said shyly. He had orange hair, Irish freckles, and nice blue eyes. He wore a pair of dark denim jeans with a white tee-shirt, backpack slung over his shoulder.

"Um, hi," returned Ashley, looking puzzled. She looked over her shoulder to see if her mother was watching. "Wh-what are you doing here?"

"Uh, well, you left something in my car from the other day." Henry pulled a box of condoms out of his backpack. He handed them to Ashley. It took a moment to process until she finally realized they were _her_ condoms. She could feel the color rising in her cheeks. She had wondered where they had gone the past eight months.

"Oh," she said, and set the condoms down at a nearby coffee table. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," Henry said. "I—um, bye." He ran down the steps and into the driveway to his car.

Ashley bolted down the steps and halfway out the driveway. "Hey, wait!" she said, but Henry had already raced off. She shook her head. "Coward."

She heard someone—or possibly some_thing_—cough behind the bushes. Ashley faltered, wondering if she was imagining this. "Hey, who's behind there?" she called. No answer. She walked slowly, like a cat on the prowl, around the bush. Suddenly, Ricky jumped out.

"Oh!" she cried, taken by alarm. She took a few moments to catch her breath. "Who _are_ you? You look familiar."

"I'm Ricky," he said. "Remember? Your sister? Her…?" Ricky gestured to his own stomach.

"Oh, right, you're the one who got her pregnant." Ashley crossed her arms. "What are you doing here? She said _she_ would call you when _she_ wanted."

"_She_ did call," Ricky retorted. "Said she wanted to talk." He walked around Ashley, and before he knocked on the door, he turned around again. "Hey," he said to Ashley, who was still standing there, confused. "You like that kid?"

Ashley didn't answer at first. "Maybe," she said. "Who cares?"

"I hear he's single." Ricky smiled a little, surprising even himself. "And I hear he likes someone." He turned back, looked at the ground, and knocked, not sure what to say next.

Amy took her time getting down the stairs, clutching her belly as she did. "Who is it?" she called, which was pretty stupid to say since she knew it was Ricky.

"It's me," he said. Amy recognized his voice and opened the door quickly.

"Hi," said Amy, and smiled, trying to calm her nerves. "Um, come in." She opened the door wider so Ricky could step in.

"No, it's okay. I'm fine outside," Ricky said, seemingly self-confident. Amy rolled her eyes and took his hand, pulling him inside. It felt warm and clammy…or maybe that was her hand.

She stopped and turned around, as she had been guiding him to the family room. "Hey—were you talking to my sister out there?"

"Yeah? So?" Ricky was in a bad mood. He always seemed annoyed lately—was he thinking about the baby too? "I can talk to whoever I want."

Amy began to rethink whether talking to Ricky would be the right thing to do. "Never mind," she snapped. They came to the dimly lighted family room, and stood in the space between the coffee table and the couch. Ricky looked down at Amy's hand, which—to Amy's embarrassment—was still interlocked with his.

"Oh, right, sorry," Amy said, quickly pulling away and wiping her hand on her jeans. Ricky gave that overbearing crooked smile of his and sat down.

"So? What do you want to 'talk' about so badly? I can't stay long. I've got a meeting with my therapist." Ricky laid back, foot set on the table comfortably. He seemed relaxed all of a sudden.

"I need to talk to you about the…baby." Amy avoided Ricky's eyes and stared at the walls, choosing her words carefully. "I—I've decided to keep him." She took her chance and glanced over at Ricky. His eyes had dropped to his shoe, which was propped up on the sturdy wooden table. It slid off absentmindedly.

"Oh." He didn't take his eyes off the flower pot on the table. Amy wished he would look at her. "I thought you were…putting it up for adoption, though."

"So did I," said Amy. She could feel the strength gaining in her voice. "But when I went to that clinic the other day…after I saw…_you_…I guess I just decided to keep him." Now she didn't take her eyes off him. She wanted him to look at her. "Ricky, I want my baby to have a good life, even if he's going to be raised by two teenagers." She winced as Ricky's head snapped around, eyes wide.

"_Two_ teenagers?" Ricky sounded petrified. He wasn't sure of what she had just said. He was sure that Amy wasn't seeing anybody. And if she wasn't seeing anybody…did she mean what she just said? As soon as it made sense, he cried, "Are you on drugs?"

Amy looked taken aback. "What? No, listen to me—!"

"I'm not going to listen to you if you're going to talk crap like this!" Ricky stood up, nearly running for the door.

"Ricky, no!" Amy cried. She got up and tried to walk as fast she could. "Why are you leaving? I haven't even finished!"

"I already know what you're going to say, Juergens. You want me to help you raise the baby, huh? Want me to be a father against my own will?" Ricky made a show of covering his ears as Amy opened her mouth to protest.

"My gosh, Ricky, do you only think about the worst parts of everything?" Amy shouted. They were actually _shouting_, like an old married couple. "I _know_ you care for my baby. He's _your_ baby, too, after all! Do you ever listen to _anyone_?"

"I don't care about your baby, okay? Hear that? _Your_ baby! I don't give a crap if you tell people it was Ben, either! He can take credit if he wants. For all I care, _he_ could help you raise him!" Ricky finally turned and looked her right in her eyes. "_I don't care about you!_ I don't need you or your kid in my life!"

Amy was desperate. Her mind was reeling; Ricky was angry now, and there was no way to convince him. "Yes, but I need _you_, Ricky!" she blurted. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw a gentle expression take over Ricky's face.

"What?" Ricky said after a moment of dead silence. It seemed that the world had stopped turning, along with his breathing.

Amy let out a sob. "Yeah. I need you, Ricky. I thought I hated you, but I guess I've been loving you this whole time. I can't do this alone, Ricky, whether I keep him or not. I need someone who cares about my baby, someone who's willing to do anything for him." Amy paused and looked into Ricky's eyes. "Someone who's willing to do anything for me."

"W-Well, I wouldn't say I fit that criteria," said Ricky sarcastically. Amy laughed a little, not knowing whether he was serious or not. Suddenly she ran to him, throwing her arms around his waist, head pressed against his chest, not caring whether he would push her away or just leave her there. Not caring whether he would reject her or love her back or whatever else he could do.

Ricky was shocked. He had never suspected this. _Especially_ not after the way Amy had yelled at him in the clinic. He wondered what he should do—tell her he couldn't do this or that he felt the same way. He wasn't so sure at that moment.

"I love you, Ricky," Amy whispered. After hearing this, he knew she was right—he cared about the baby. He cared about her, too. Everything he said had been a lie…he just never realized it. Eventually his arms found their way around Amy, holding her close. Amy pulled away, and leaned up towards Ricky's face. He leaned in too. They kissed, kissed for what seemed like days, and continued on into their forever.

**A/N: This is the last chapter! I will not be updating this story anymore :( I had to end it because school is starting soon and so I will not have as much time! Pleeeease review!**


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